my eyes trace the impossible orbit of a burning star
swallowed by a black hole of life and death,
of loving and grieving.
my camera starts rolling,
you smile for me all crooked, because after all,
it’s your big debut scene
and you’re the star.
tell me, do you know your lines?
my dear, do you know what spills over your crimson lips?
dashes and dots, don’t speak to me in code,
tell me why your shirt is stained the same colour as your lips.
this isn’t a re-enactment of romeo and juliet,
rehearsal was over the moment you fell into this world.
you’re going off script but at least you look great
your makeup is smudged
your nose is all bloodied
trails of tears roll down your face
remind me to give the special effects artist a raise.
it’s all just a movie to me,
when did you start falling, my star?
a foolproof plan to red carpet fame:
to throw yourself a pity party in the darkest hour of the night,
call it the afterparty.
to have your heart hanging by a thread on your sleeve,
tell me, did you get what you wanted?
my camera zooms in on your face.
your eyes are fading embers of the flames they once were,
a lost brightness even the glare of a thousand stage lights around us couldn’t bring back.
winter is rolling around, this calls for a set change
is it the cold bite of the storm that rattles relentlessly at the window
or is it the shattering of your fragile heart?
and so i leave my camera atop your bleeding heart
i hope that when spring comes,
the roses will curl gently between your fingers and
the wind will blow tender breezes through your hair
because you wanted to die for love.
you always had.